my life needs to speed up and slow down

well since september a lot has happened that it feels like years ago that i posted but when i thnk about it not that much has really happened and time has gone slow...

Mackennon was finally able to get circumcised!! it was a rough few days but he did GREAT!!! even since then he has grow sooo much! he still can't crawl but he loves tummy time so i think we're just days away before he gets the hang of it. he does roll and pull himself to wherever he needs to be like to get his favorite book or toys. he has started to say a few words too! with his favorite book he will say "daydee" which means baby and then gives the book a kiss. he also LOVES his "daynkie" wich is balnkie! he can also say yay while clapping his hands! as for motor tricks he can roll his arms, he has to hit his mouth whenever he does it, and he can throw his arms above his head when we say "how big is mackennon? soooo big' its amazing to see how much he has grown in two months and i can't wait to see how much more he grows in two more months! his personality has started to come out more and more too. he is a funny kid and loves to make people smile and laugh. he still doesn't have any teeth but that makes for a fun bath time when he can launch a foam toy out of his mouth!

as for me i am doing a lot better i went to many dr after i passed out and my dizziness and headaches wouldn't stop. they ruled out anything in my brain and they also did an inner ear test and it wasn't a balance issue. the only thing they could think of was migraines. since then i haven't been dizzy and the headaches are starting to go away!

as for mr cory he has been working hard and being a great dad! i wish there was more to brag about him but everyday is almost the same with us. his birthday is on monday and i can't wait!! birthdays have been very big in my family and not so much in his, so i feel it is my duty to make up for all those years and i have been!

his gangster jammies before surgey
look at how low i can wear my pants





im ready for surgey with my slippers and all

the pumpkins all lit up

his sunday best

his carved pumpkin

he loves his dads glasses

him and some of his cousins on halloween

duck and hunter

nananananananananan batman!!!

family picture

mom can i eat this straw?!?!?

found his pumpkin!










this is mack doing all his tricks!

this is him shooting the foam toy out of his mouth. the video makes mroe sense

Remember, remember the 11th of September

So since i don't post much i thought i would post about 9/11 today...

It has been 10 years since i sat in my freshman history class and watched history happen.... A lot in my life has happened with many moments of not thinking about 9/11. this weekend the city of Sandy did an AMAZING! tribute to the fallen of 9/11.



In a patch of grass in downtown sandy they had put up 3031 flags for every person who lost their lives tat sad sad day. it was very overwhelming to see rows and rows of American flags

Cory and mack were reading a tag that is on every flag. the tag gave each flag a name, age, and brief story of the person it represents This is a tag on one flag. Many of these tags brought me to tears.

As part of the tribute they had a "fire ride' which was about1,000-1,500 motorcyclist riding from sandy to ogden with some fire engines in on the ride. again made me cry to see all those people coming together for thousands that they never knew...

the main part of the day was a ceremony to reveal this beautiful bronze statue which was named "hope rising" it was a wonderful statue

this was an enormous flag hanging in front of sandy city hall
As it has been 10 years and many things have happened i feel i am now more mature it has hit me how horrific, sad, etc. 9/11 was. i feel so lucky to have my family all with me and safe. i am more grateful for those who risk their lives everyday to keep me and my family safe and for those who lost loved ones on that horribly sad day... I'll never forget

Good bye summer.....

So again i am horrible at updating! but all i can say is this last month+ has been the craziest ever!

of course we had many family parties and get togethers.... well since the last post mack has turned 8 months and will be 9 months next sunday!!! i swear i just had him last month and he should still be my little new born baby! BUT i LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE this stage of his life!! he has blossomed with such a cute character! he hasn't hit any motor skills besides sitting up, but im no worried he was a premie and will be a little delayed and i am okay with that. he has grown lots! he now weighs about 18 lbs! just think in 9 months he has gained 13 lbs! and alomst grown 1.5 feet!

well me and mack got to go to sunny california again in august! this time we were helping throw a bridal shower for miss kendall and then her bachlorette party! it was super fun! mack is an amazing travler! not only does he have ever flight attendant wrapped around his finger but he ususally just sleeps during the flight. we then came home and had a fun boating trip with my family. this was the firat time mack had ever been boating and he did okay.... he realy didn't love the life vest but quickly fell asleep on the boat. i did take him on a nice ery slow tub ride with his cousins chase and carson and his aunt nikki. he didn't think that was fun. he didn't like the water splasing his face. then came labor day weekend! last year we started the fun tradition of going to downey idaho at DownAtA hot springs camping place. My father in law Travis saves all of his extra wire all year and we kids strip it down to the copper and recycle it for money, then that money goes to all the familys and pays for everything even our gas money going up and down!! it is such a fun weekend!! last year i was 6.5 months pregnant and i still loved it! this year it was a lot more fun! so at the place we rent out the "overflow" area and have a nice grassy field usually to ourselves so we play fun games and lounge around. then they "resort" has a bi hotspring pool. when they fill up the pool everynight it comes from the srping at 107 degrees and they then add cooler water depending on how warm it will be the next day. that weekend was a little cooler so the pool was like a perfect abth tub temp. mackennon LOVES LOVES LOVES water and when it was warm and he didn't get cold he was in heaven! they alos have fun adult slides that i got to go down this year and that was fun. one of the days we were there we went into pcatello to get some amazing mexican food that me and cory crave all year round. this time w brought all 21 of us into the tiny restaruant and took over the place. the owner came in to help with our big group. since getting home we have been getting everything ready for his sad little circumscision that he will FINALLY be getting this tuesday.

( for you who don't know, no we did not circumscise him when he was born because he was in the nicu, then since he came home on oxygen his peditrician wanted all of his enegery to go into getting off of oxygen and thought that the procedure would only set him back... plus he said if we waited until he was 6 months old they could put him under so he didn't feel anything and we would know if he was healthy enough to have surgery. yes since we have to go to a pediatric urologist it took us 3 months to get mack in!)

As for me since our fun cali trip i have been (again) having stupid medical problems. when i came home i got very very dizzy and losing my hair like i just had a baby. so i thought i was anemic adn started taking iron pills. well a week into that i passedout in my bathroom and decided to finally go to the dr. they took about half of my blood and did tons of tests. well everything came back "normal".... so now i am still dizzy, started getting headaches, losing my memory, and extremely fatigued.. so i get to go visit a nuerologist next week!! i am scared but trying to keep busy so i don't think about it all day long!

Mr cory is still plugging away at work and cant wait until october to finally have is vacations!

NOW FOR THE PICTURES>>>>FINALLY!

Mrs kendall after her bridal sower with her rehersal bouguetMack loving the boating tubeMack, Carson, Chase, Nikki, and I tubingCamping in downey helping dad blow up the air mattressHaving his favorite treat... a suckerHis bestfriend and cousin Bridger Ready to go home

Wow we have been busy!!

Well i thought it had only been like a week or two since my last post.. no try three!!! so again i will have lots of pictures and what not.

well mack got to celebrate his first 4th of July! and i think he liked it!! we spent Sunday night at Cory's grandparents house in our tents in their back yard. i was scared mack would be too hot or too cold or not sleep and keep everyone up. well not at all.. he slept like a champ and a few cousins woke up before he did!!! we then got ready for the day and went to the annual Murray parade! he did sleep through about 20 min of it but he didn't miss much! then that night we all hangout in the grandparents front yard and watch the Murray park fireworks! but mack slept through it all, even the loud booms!

Cory and mack at the parade

eating a creamcicle to cool off




waiting for it to get dark for the fireworks

mack has also turned 7 months old. my little baby has grown up so fast!! makes me sad but i LOVE LOVE LOVE this stage of his life. he has learned how to sit up all by himself, and plays with toys all the time. it gives me a nice break to do the dishes or clean up around him. I'm finding that cleaning up only happens at night and by noon the next day the house looks like i didn't touch it! oh well! mack has also started to reach for people and act "shy"... that part i love cause he snuggles into me!

well the 24 of July came and went this last weekend. and for any of you non utardians that means nothing!!! but here in the land of "Zion" it is the celebration of the year! its the most random state holiday that everyone takes so seriously. every year i am grateful to have a reason to take work off and to hang out with family and friends and see more fireworks but i giggle at the fact we are celebrating the pioneers coming to Utah and settling the state of Utah. growing up we never had Idaho day.. i don't even think we learned when Idaho became a state!!!

well this year pioneer day was on Sunday and being a Mormon holiday it was celebrated on Saturday and Monday! so Saturday we did what we did last year and will do from years to come, we went to a salt lake bee's baseball game with our friends and their little girl and new little guy. after the game they have AMAZING fireworks that are better then the 4th. kinda sad but worth watching! we were scared mack wold scream and hate them, but of course he is like his dad and watched them with the biggest eyes. it was also 1130 at night wayyyy past his bed time. but of course he HATES when people cheer. he cried during the whole game but loved the loudest part of the night. then Sunday we went to grandma moss house to celebrate all the July birthdays. then Monday Cory had to work, (hp does not see pioneer day as important) so my sister Nikki, kayleen, melissa and i plus all the kids went on that same hike to the pretty waterfall. the youngest was 3 and they did great on the hike, then after we found some random school and had a picnic. that night we decided to go to the days of 47 rodeo.... BAD BAD BAD idea!!! Mack thought it was too loud and too much cheering. he screamed the whole time and we left early. the minute we got to our car he was all smiles.. naughty!

mack at his first bee's game!!! his look makes me think he was thinking " this is a HUGE bug!"

As for me and Cory nothing too new. Cory's company he works for was bought out by hp and he became an official hp employee. with that we got a nice new laptop and a tiny tiny raise!!!! but with all the meetings and signing up for new benefits and 401k he has gotten a good amount of overtime! yay for us! well here are some pictures and video since our last post!

the boys in their matching "A-Team" softball jerseys

this is mack dieing laughing at his toy elephant

LOTS OF PICTURES!!!!

So this post is going to have lots of pictures and a video!! i finally got most of our pics up on the computer and off our phones!! this last week and a few days has been busy! last Saturday Cory took me and Mack on a fun little hike ! once we made it to the top we found an amazing waterfall and we took family pictures! then on Tuesday Mack went to his six month appointment! the little guy isn't so little! he now weighs 15.8 lbs!!!! he's also 27 inches long! from his 4 month to his 6 month his weight went from the 9% to the 25%!!!! and his length went from the 25% to the 75%!!! putting him on rice and baby food has sure made the difference! now for the pictures!!!


This is mack laughing one night while i made faces at him,...

This is Cory and mack on our way up to the trail head!
me and mack on a tree limb
Cory and mack on the tree
you can kinda see the waterfall behind us
our family picture in front of the waterfall!!! it's amazing how 20 min from our house there is the beautiful waterfall!
just the waterfall
the view from our hike.... it's been a while since just me and Cory took a picture togetherthe man cave!!!
once a week me and mack try to go take a picnic with Cory in a park by the university of Utah. the kid sure loves his mt dew just like his dad! he really really really loved those peach O's as well

this was at his cousins pirate birthday party!!!

my favorite picture in the whole wide world!!!!!!


so this has been our week and i am trying more and more to take pictures and upload!!!

Not really Tueller Tuesday...

Well i found time in my crazy schedule so i thought i would post something! i know its not Tuesday but Thursday is close enough!!! Sorry Nicole for taking your day!
Well since last week and deleting my facebook i have found i am more bored then usual, so to make up on time i have decided to start making my own baby food..... I NEED HELP!!! i made some peas because those are macks favorite but the poor kid can't handle my homemade peas. his tummy does great with the Gerber ones but not my peas. he still is a happy baby and doesn't seem in pain he just spits up a lot more! so we moved back to pears and i bought some more Gerber food until i can figure out this whole making food bit! this last week mack turned 6 months!! he has also started to sit up more and more on his own. he even thinks during a diaper change is the best time to sit up.... if any of you are on facebook and "like" the Gerber page i have signed mack up for there photo contest!!! his # is 68294.voting doesn't start until July 5!! so mark your calenders!! (this picture was taken by Kendall while visiting her in California)

as for me i have just been staying busy with mack and going to work my 2 days a week! nothing too new or exciting has happened. i might be starting to go to a zumba class!!! we'll see with my schedule!

Cory has had a big change! HE'S DONE WITH SCHOOL!!!! well not forever but for a little while!!! and i love having him home on Tuesdays and Thursdays now! those days always feel like a Friday now! he also had his first fathers day! but of course i got him sick so he spent a lot of his fathers day in bed resting or at the doctors making sure he didn't have strep! poor guy! but that night we went to his grandparents house with the WHOLE family and opened gifts there! not to boast but i did get him the best gift there!!! since we registered for our wedding he has talked about this toaster that makes an egg mcmuffin! so after 4 years i FINALLY remembered and i got it for him!so far i have used it everyday and love it!!! he has used it once....as cheesy as it sounds it is the best appliance i have ever purchased!!! love it!!!

we are so grateful to be a family and to have been able to spend fathers day together!! check in next week for more updates!! (should be on Tuesday!!)

big update!

so as some of you know I did decide to delete my facebook account. it was starting to take over my life... i couldn't go more then an hour without checking it or doing something on it. it also started to hurt me and Cory. instead of being with him talking to him or anything i was on fb. i was not healthy at all... so after swallowing my pride i did it! i am social network free!!!!still feels a little strange but maybe 'll put more time into my blog and keeping everyone updated this way! now if you really want to keep in touch and you don't have my phone number PLEASE add Cory as a friend on facebook! we might make it a family facebook account.

Rollin' on the river

This week has been so full of things to talk about, but knowing me I know I will forget most of them!
Mack: This kid is getting very big. today he had a weight check at the Dr's to see how well he is doing on his new formula. well hes 10 pounds .5 oz!!! My dad said he was a good for nothing until he hit 10 pounds and he did it! the Dr was very impressed and happy with his progress. another HUGE thing mack did this week was roll from his belly to his back! on Friday night Cory thought it would be a good thing to put him on his belly to see how well he does just hanging out and within 30 sec mack rolled over so Cory thought it was a fluke and put him back on his belly, well the kid rolled over again and i got to see it. so of course just to make sure it was legit we had him do it a third time! that time we got in on Cory's phone. then on Saturday i thought i would see if he would do it again and sure enough he did it again that day 3 times!!! here's a video that i have of him rolling over!

Steph: with all of mackennons achievements it has kept me happy during some hard times. this last week i went to my obgyn and had them look at my breasts. well they then sent me to a breast surgeon... yeah not the news i wanted. well i went and met with her yesterday and i now get to go have an ultrasound on Thursday morning. Depending on what they see in the ultrasound means if i have surgery or not. because i still will have more kids she didn't want to go in and preform surgery and me not be able to nurse unless i for surely 100% have a papiloma. she said that with future kids this problem could happen again and its my decision to nurse them or not. she said it would be wise to nurse them but if i bleed again i would need to stop just like this last time. so there is a part of me that really wants the surgery so i can nurse with out any problems with my next child but again surgery is surgery and its not fun especially with a baby.

if i do have to have surgery what will happen is i get an ultrasound and they numb the area and hook a wire into the tissue mass. then i go into surgery and they put me to sleep were the surgeon goes in and makes an incision and then pulls out the milk duct and tissue with the wire. it sounds really nasty but she said it wasn't too bad and that after time to let things heal i will be able to nurse again!

Cory: I feel bad this kid hasn't had too much going on besides taking care of emotional me and cute mack! it is starting to become testing season for firefighting and he will be starting school next month so hopefully he'll have some more exciting things to share!

I hope everyone feels up to date!! again this next week should be full of answers (hopefully) and potential stress or relief!

Looking at the brightside!

This last week has gone by so fast! I almost forgot to post today because I couldn't believe it was Tuesday already!
Mackennon: This last week has been a little crazy! Because of some bleeding issues (which I will address later) we got to go for a weight check at the Dr's office. He weighed 9 pounds 8 ounces! He's getting so big! BUT not big enough. He had only gained about 3 oz in two weeks and his Dr was not happy with that! So he got put on nutramigen... yes the $21 formula! I guess I must have stated how bad I didn't want my baby on formula too much because he is and its the most expensive out there. Luckily he has an AMAZING pediatrician and he gave me 3 sample containers and when we go back for another weight check next Tuesday he said he would give me more! He's such a great Dr. Then Mack went on his first road trip to Pocatello Idaho!! and he did GREAT! The poor thing was in his car seat for most of Saturday but you wouldn't have known. Then on Sunday we made the forever long back roads drive to a tiny tiny tiny town called Arbon Valley! His little (well bigger then him but younger) friend Hal was being blessed! It was so fun to see Shancy and Kade, also their crazy 2 yr old Zane, who kept telling me and Cory to stop touching "his Hal!"

Me and Shancy..................................................BEFORE...............................................
Mackennon and Hal..................................AFTER!.........................................................................


Steph and Cory: well for poor Cory nothing too exciting has happened besides work and scouts, but of course as for me more and more is happening. Since the last post we thought I was having nursing problems from my nipples. well I went on every yeast treatment I could get on. nystatin, gentiviolet, hydrocortozone, and neosporin! I thought it was working until Wednesday morning, mack slept through the night and woke up at 730. So I nursed him and it started to hurt a little, it had hurt worse before with no blood, so I thought nothing of it. As I was changing his diaper and clothes that's when I realized he had only drank blood and no milk. The poor kid kept spiting up clots through his cute smiles! At that moment I stopped nursing and he went on a bottle that day. Finally at 330 I decided to pump. Well it was only to have blood coming out of my milk ducts! Needless to say I'm going to the Dr tomorrow to get things checked out. From the few people I have spoken with they think I have intraductal papilomas. Basically is a benign tumor inside my milk ducts. They do have to be surgically removed but they aren't life threatening. I am scared because of course it could be worse, and in my family we're never "normal", but we wont know until I get an ultrasound done. So now I am 100% done nursing which makes me very very sad. I loved that bonding with Mack and I know he will miss it too. But I have to look at the bright side and now feeding time can happen ANYWHERE! I can eat dairy and eggs again. I can also have PEPSI!!! It gives Cory and my mooter in law and mom some special bonding time with him when we go visit! It also means I don't have to occupy a massage room at work to pump! It also means I will finally (hopefully) get my bald fat baby!! As the week goes on I will learn more and more about whats going on with my body and future nursing.. so check in next week to see what else my body wants to do to me!!

tueller tuesdays!

so my friend has a blog and she does thurgood Thursdays and i thought i should totally steal her idea and update every Tuesday!! so thank you Nicole for your awesome idea that i am now stealing!!

Mack: This week was a crazy busy week for mack. it was also a little tough on him. (THIS PART MIGHT BE TMI FOR SOME OF YOU). i had decided to take away my nipple shield and try the good old fashion nursing.... well needless to say mack got strawberry and cherry milk. yes it had lots of blood. so my poor little guy was spiting up blood with a smile on his face. i was able to go to a lactation specialist on Tuesday and she helped a lot but the bleeding and pain kept coming. by Saturday my poor baby was spiting up blood clots. at that moment i stopped nursing and we went to a formula bottle. it wasn't until Monday afternoon i tried nursing again and it was a blood free pain free crying event!!
the other huge event in macks life was his blessing. it was a packed house. our ward had 2 baby blessings and a mission far well. there were people to the stage! Cory did an amazing job on macks blessing and yes i cried! it was so touching to see 18+ men circling my baby! it was a tight circle and kinda miss shaped but we got everyone in!
Steph- this week was rough on me for the same reasons as mack. on that Tuesday he also got his shots.... but he did great!
that Friday the whole tueller family got to go to desert star! it was a fun break from a crazy day. first off mack had a rough night so i had a rough night. i was then woken up to a phone call from my dad that my mom was in a car accident and was in the hospital. shes okay just has a really banged up right side and hurt wrist and pinkie finger. she was also my babysitter for that night so i got to call around to find someone. luckily my nephew was done with basketball and my sister took him for the night. we ended up staying over there after the play till almost one! we love their family!
Cory- his week consists of lots of work and scouts. he was supposed to go on a camp out this last weekend but because of macks blessing he stayed home to help me get ready for the shindig. we also got to go hang out with some friends from Idaho and spend time with their 2 sons. they also just had a little boy who is 5 weeks younger then mack and hes two times the size!! it was fun to see them.

Mackennons photo shoot

here are some of mackennons photos by kim

here are the amazing pictures kim did for us!!!